frozen river
Ice on the North Fortk
The late afternoon sun reflects off of ice on the North Fork of The Shoshone near the mouth of its canyon west of Cody, Wyoming Copyright by WyoJones. All rights reserved. Used with permission.

When I was young, there was a very popular song called “Turn, Turn, Turn,” that become a hit in 1965. It was taken from the scripture: “To everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under heaven.”

For some reason, that song came back to me today when I was trying to formulate my thoughts for today’s blog. Here’s the complete text of the scripture from the Book of Ecclesiastes in the Bible. 

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:

A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, a time to reap that which is planted;

A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;

A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;

A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;

A time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;

A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace. Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

While the scripture covers a lot of ground, today—for me—it’s about patience. Patience has been a challenge for me for pretty much all my life. And just when I think I’ve “mastered” it, I lose it.

It’s very discouraging. Rather like the week that has just passed. But the past week isn’t about what happened, or at least that’s not what this blog is about. It’s more about how I feel about what happened. It’s about getting another kick-in-the-teeth reminder that I still need to work on patience.

And that I’m not in charge of what “time” it is for someone else.

That I need to keep cultivating patience in myself, and giving others the space and time to work out their own seasons’ challenges.

That when I try to “help” someone else take a shortcut to learning important life lessons, that might not be that helpful.

Yeah, I know some things that those younger than me don’t know. Sometimes I even think I’m wise. But I learned all of this by living. Making mistakes. Picking myself up and trying again. Yeah, if “the young” would listen to me, they wouldn’t have to face plant. But they also might not learn what I learned.

I don’t know.

Who am I to decide that? I’m not wise enough to know what someone else can learn from talking, and what lessons can only be learned from living through their personal seasons. I know I fell a lot—despite a lot of talking from people who wanted to help me. But I learned.

I’m still learning. (I hope.) This week has mostly been “a time to weep.” Hopefully the “time to rejoice” will follow at some point. And I hope that I have enough patience to wait for the right time. To not just be patient, but to respect others’ seasons, to know when it is the season to speak and when it is the season to respect their right to choose.

And a time to every purpose under heaven…

What about you? Do you remember the song? Did it have special meaning for you or were you like me and just thought it sounded cool? Have you struggled with knowing what season you’re in? Wanted to speed up someone else’s season? I love comments so much that I pick a favorite to receive my monthly AnaBanana gift basket ($25 value).  Recipient is announced the first blog post of the new month.

Perilously yours,

Pauline

P.S. I was trying to think what book was the most about personal choice and agency and decided that would be Relatively Risky, included in The Big Uneasy BundleNell has a lot of people trying to get her to do what they want—including her deceased parents (no, no ghosts, except the metaphorical ones).

BU-3d-vendors

A Season to Learn
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17 thoughts on “A Season to Learn

  • January 23, 2016 at 12:57 am
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    I love that song. It’s good to let those tears flow sometimes. I hope you’re now able to rejoice.

    I can totally relate to this post. Been there, done that. Trying to help someone else has backfired plenty of times. I guess some of us just need to go to the School of Hard Knocks to learn some good lessons. Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever graduate. 🙂

    • January 23, 2016 at 12:23 pm
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      Yeah, I’m still in the hard knocks school, which makes me wonder why I think I’m competent to tutor anyone? haha Thanks so much for stopping by. 😀

  • January 21, 2016 at 1:57 pm
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    I do know that song very well. It was first published in the late 1950’s by Pete Seeger, who I’ve never heard of. But I do remember Judy Collins’s rendition and then of course, the Birds who made it very popular. Yes I’m that old. But the words of wise King Solomon still stand true. I, like you, have always struggled with patience. But I think a lot of it comes from an underlying spirit of the world that encourages us to have to have things now. Why wait? Life’s short. And that predominant attitude makes it difficult to overcome a lack of patience. We get frustrated with not only ourselves but others. too And yet, we all struggle with similar things and situations. So hang in there Pauline. 2016 has not started off well. We’ve lost some talented people during the last few weeks and I think it has had an affect on all of us. So you’re in good company. Take care. ((Hugs))

    • January 21, 2016 at 2:53 pm
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      thanks so very much for the kind words! And yeah, I’m that old, too! haha Yeah, the month is slowly getting better. Though there are some things that just take time to resolve. Oh well. Thank you and hugs back!

  • January 18, 2016 at 1:42 pm
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    I’m definitely finishing sentences for others. I’m embarrassed to say this but it still happens after I’ve been told by family members over and over again. My season is to learn from that.

    • January 18, 2016 at 2:03 pm
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      That’s a pretty mild fault, IMHO. But would be hard to stop, too. I might, um, do that on occasion. haha

  • January 13, 2016 at 12:04 pm
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    Give me patience…NOW!
    I knew someone who finished sentences for people; it drove me nuts and stopped me from doing the same thing. I know things are going as well as they can right now, I just want them to get better right away.
    Being impatient is not the best thing for writers is it???
    MonaKarel recently posted…Let it Snow #OldLadySuccesses #MFRWAuthorMy Profile

    • January 13, 2016 at 12:27 pm
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      LOL You’re so right! I feel like Beruka (sp?) in Willy Wonka. I want it NOW! Oh well, hopefully I will live long enough to learn. (That should be the Vulcan mantra. haha) So glad you stopped by!

  • January 13, 2016 at 10:12 am
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    When it comes to getting things done or doing them the right way rather than allowing people to make their own mistakes, I’m definitely not the most patient person. I’m also not terribly patient with waiting through the seasons in life, but I’m learning. I have a very goal-oriented personality, so it can be difficult for me when I need to wait on situations to change and timing to be right 🙂
    Marcy Kennedy recently posted…6 Qualities of Bad WritingMy Profile

    • January 13, 2016 at 12:26 pm
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      I know, right? You’re like, it’s SO obvious what needs to be done, but then they don’t learn anything. I remind myself that the learning is the more important thing than “right.” But it’s hard! haha Thanks so much for stopping by. 🙂

  • January 13, 2016 at 7:31 am
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    I loved that song when I was growing up, Pauline! Even back then, I had trouble understanding why there should be a “time” for the bad things (listed in both Bible and song verses).

    Patience is something that does not come easily to me. Sometimes I struggle to refrain from finishing people’s sentences, LOL. But raising 3 boys (now 22, 19, and 15) has taught me (it took a while; I’m stubborn that way) that patience is absolutely essential. They don’t grow, learn, and gain confidence unless you can step back and let them do things for themselves. Sometimes they take my advice, and sometimes they don’t. Sigh.

    Hang in there, Pauline!
    K.B. Owen recently posted…State of the Union as spectator sportMy Profile

  • January 12, 2016 at 7:28 pm
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    i enjoyed this post. LOVED the song growing up–still love it. What i started thinking about was that we are not in just one season at a time…i’m in different seasons with different things going on. as for patience, i have a matra that i repeat in my head…”kathy, you are only responsible for you and what you think and do–don’t go “there” with anyone else–you are only responsible for you”. (yup, i talk to myself a lot 🙂 )

    • January 12, 2016 at 9:06 pm
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      I have been talking to myself a lot lately, for sure. Thank you so much for sharing that with me. Glad you enjoyed the post. Isn’t it funny how a song can speak to you for years and years? Take care!
      Pauline Jones recently posted…googlecd20eb13f78687f0My Profile

    • January 12, 2016 at 9:42 am
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      Yeah, I’ve spent my life trying to master it. Maybe I should aim to be an apprentice? haha (I’m going to hang onto the wheel and hope it lifts me out of the mud. haha) Thanks for stopping by and the encouraging words. O.O

  • January 11, 2016 at 5:08 pm
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    Haven’t heard it in a long time. I’m quite patient but it’s been a trying week for me to. My stars said Uranus conjures up a surprise. Looking forward to it

    • January 11, 2016 at 6:47 pm
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      I don’t know what it is with this week, but yeah. Hope yours gets better!

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